How to help your teen cope with university rejections

Jan 20, 2023
2 min read

Updated: Jul 22

The UCAS (Universities and Colleges Admissions Service) application process can be a stressful and emotional time for teenagers and their families. The anticipation of waiting for acceptance letters can be nerve-wracking, and the disappointment of receiving a rejection can feel devastating. As a parent, it’s important to support your teen through this process and help them navigate their next steps. Here are six tips for supporting your teen through UCAS rejections.

How to help your teen cope with university rejections

1. Validate their feelings

It’s important to acknowledge and validate your teenager’s feelings of disappointment and sadness. Let them know it’s normal to feel this way and that you understand their disappointment.

2. Encourage them to take time to process their feelings

Give your teen time to process their feelings and come to terms with the rejection. Encourage them to talk to friends and family about how they feel, and to do things they enjoy.

3. Help them to refocus

After your teenager has had time to process their feelings, help them refocus on their next steps. Have they been rejected by one or all of their university choices? Can they apply for additional courses through UCAS Extra? Perhaps they may want to focus on their revision and wait until they have their results before applying to new courses through Clearing. Remind your teen that, while a university rejection is disappointing and can feel personal, they still have options.

4. Encourage them to stay positive

It’s important to remind your teen that a university rejection is not the end of the world. Encourage them to stay positive and keep an open mind about their future options. Even if they’ve been rejected by their first choice, help them find positives in others. Do they offer different modules that could be more beneficial to their chosen career route? Are they closer to home, or in a more interesting part of the country?

Spend some time with your teen focusing on the choices they do have, so they can start to feel excited about their new possibilities.

5. Support them in their decision

Ultimately, the decision of what to do next is up to your teenager. It’s important to support them, whether they choose to take a year out, attend a different university, or explore alternative options.

6. Seek professional guidance

Sometimes it can be difficult for parents to provide the guidance and support needed during such a stressful time. Consider seeking professional guidance from a school counsellor or careers adviser who can offer an objective perspective and support your teenager in making their next steps.

Improve their confidence in interviews

If you’d like to know how your teen can stand out from others and improve their chances at interviews, read our suggestions in The Parents’ Guide to Developing Skills and Character. It includes sections on: